Saturday, December 6, 2008

I came across 2 empty liter beer bottles in the basement while throwing away old wrapping paper. And then I found a knapsack full of spray paint, probably about thirty cans of it. And a pipe for smoking dope. All this took place while hubs, S and L were at the Christmas parade. So when they came home, I sent the girls upstairs and Husband and I confronted S.
What is all this junk about?
I am so tired of listening to his explanations that are devoid of truth and personal responsibility. Everything is someone else's fault and while he admits that he went to work "f'd up", his contention is that nobody noticed and plays no part in the reason why he can't find a job. The pipe is his girlfriend's. The spray paint is for vandalizing at night, which, according to him, he isn't doing anymore. And I am just a big stupid snoop who doesn't see what the older brother is doing/has done and certainly didn't discipline. We only focus on S and unfairly at that. He just doesn't get why we won't let him do anything: drink, smoke dope, do drugs, spray paint the town. We are so un-flippin-reasonable.
He stormed out of the house.
I used to wonder what people meant when they said that Jesus was their life. Now I know because without Him, I would be in the pit of despair. I trust Him with my son's life and with mine. So, I am pressed down but not destroyed.

3 comments:

Profbaugh said...

Oh my! I'm am on my knee interceding for you my, Siesta. I can't begin to know what you're going through at this time. What I can testify to is that God is faithful, even under the most trying of circumstances.

Much love,
~Cheryl

Susan said...

ahhhhh....no wonder I felt compelled to pray specifically for you, S and your hubs today while on my knees in the sanctuary! Honestly...I was putting all my burdens on Him and your name popped right into my head and I knew I was to pray for all of you.

When I think it is so bad in my own life, all I need to do is turn to a sister/Siesta next to me and I learn how much worse it could be.

Praying for you, sweet sister.

"Just Me - NC Beth" said...

I'm trying to get caught up on reading all the blogs I follow and just read yours this morning. My friend, my heart hurts for you...I can not even imagine what you'e going through (my trials with my youngest daughter pale in comparison...and she had some real issues!)
I'm so glad you have Jesus to rely on, to see you through for in Him you will find the strength to carry on...only in Him. Praying for you, my friend.
~Beth