Tuesday, September 30, 2008

It's time to order graduation announcements. I'm trying to adjust my vision from the little bit of a girl she was to the young woman she's become.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

This picture was taken a few months ago on a bright day for S; he had enrolled in school, had a new job and his dad had bought him this car. My heart was hopeful for him.
Since then, he's totaled the car, dropped out of school and yesterday, was fired from his job. I'm trying hard to have hope for him but my heart knows that he has a larger problem that can't be fixed until he admits to it. I can't let myself think about how long, if ever, that might take. I take it day by day. Thankful for each day the Lord lets him live, praying that this day will be the day he comes to his senses.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Get ready. We're going somewhere.

Bible study is underway. I'm doing a Precepts class on the book of Philippians. Today was a wham on the top of my head. Kay Arthur talked about how Paul could endure imprisonment because he understood that it furthered the gospel and his goal in life was to that end. She spoke about how many Christians today fight with their circumstances and have regrets over their past because they don't grasp the sovereignty of God over their lives. Their goal as Christians is not about furthering the gospel. Their Christianity is about what God can do for them to make their life better.
I certainly have spent a lot of time fighting my circumstances. I've wanted God to make things right and have not trusted that He is using the wrongness of my situation to work according to His plan. I've regretted things I've done and things I haven't instead of releasing those regrets to God and allowing Him to change me.
It reminds me of when my children were small and I would tell them to Go get ready, we're going somewhere. They never wanted to go. They would dally and sometimes just plain throw a fit that I was interrupting their activities. It didn't matter that we were going for a treat or a trip to the park. They just didn't want to put on their shoes and sit strapped in their car seats. They couldn't appreciate the destination because of the journey.
I suspect that when I see the Lord and the wonders of eternity I will marvel at myself that I resisted the trials and troubles that God used to bring me there. He has promised no more tears or sorrows. What a magnificent place that must be! Why do I throw a fit and refuse to put on my shoes?

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Slipping Through My Fingers Sing Along W/ Lyrics

I was having a grand time at the movies today with my friend and then along came this song.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Off we go

L has her audition for Point Park University in Pittsburgh, Pa. on October 17th! She's spreading those wings getting ready to fly.

Thursday, September 4, 2008


Well, I got a little shocker this morning at the eye doctor's office. I wasn't very worried about seeing her because the last eye doctor I saw said that although I have high eye pressure in my left eye, he didn't think I had glaucoma. This eye doctor is a glaucoma specialist and the other doctor just wanted to cover all the bases (as he put it).

So she looked in my eyes with a really bright light and then began talking about what glaucoma is and how they treat it and I said in what I know was a dumbfounded voice, "Are you telling me that I have glaucoma?". She said, "Yes, I'm telling you that you have glaucoma." She wasn't very happy with me because I said "I don't know anyone who has glaucoma. How did I get glaucoma?" She responded with "How does anybody get anything? I'm a specialist. I don't know how you got it but I know you have it." I'm not a real quick witted woman. I was in shock, I think. After looking at me for a second she said "You didn't expect to hear this, did you?".

She may know about glaucoma but she's a little behind on reading her patients.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008


I've just decided that gone are the days when I welcomed September. When I was young and the kids were young, September was a time of promise; learning new things, a few hours to myself or to give some extra attention to the babes still at home.
But since that first child's senior year in high school, September has been the bell toll of stress and mayhem. Stress on the senior, stress from the senior. And here I am again, the bell tolling away at the start of L's senior year. Already she's wigged out over her schedule which, she believes, MUST be changed. Today was the first day of classes. She said they went well. Then, she proceeded to wig out over the hour wait between ballet classes.
I mailed off her application to audition at a dance conservatory in Pennsylvania. Stress for me. I don't really want to do this college thing again. Here she is crying and sobbing over having to take ballet. I didn't do too well. Showed my nasty side and said "I don't know why you think you want to study dance if 1 hour a week lag time is doing a number on you." Good grief. It was ugly. A screaming match. Why the heck do I care?!
Son number 2 flunked out of art school. There is nothing I can do for him. He doesn't call or come around and I think I have to just wait on the Lord. I wonder what the mother of the prodigal son was doing as the father watched their youngest son run off down the road? Did she cry and say "Go after him!"? Did she ask his friends where he was, who he was with, if he was eating? I think she must have had to follow the lead of her husband and wait for the boy to come to his senses and return on his own.
The oldest came home for the weekend. His first September where he wasn't off to school. He was a little melancholy and perhaps that rubbed off on me. It was hard to watch him board the bus for NYC knowing that he's in limbo.
I really must get myself A LIFE.